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Sunday, February 26, 2006
hmmm everything is over...hmmm i guess thats what all my friends wanna hear.ALL my friends say break only candice and sammi say no....hahhaa....but yea....sorry sammi but ur advise is sooo weird lahz....hmmm an eye for an eye is a horrible thing to do....sooo dun ppl this type of advise.hmmm now u noe wor....hahhaa...i m cheery and happy after my leader talk to me.As they prayed for me... i can feel this warm in my ear and in my body...the presence of the holy spirit....hmmm i feel so blessed....even though the break up is bcoz i luv him thats y i made this decision but nonetheless as i typed in my blog wad is not mine how much i want it...i will not have his whole heart....hmmm since they ear meant to be then yea... i shld step out and not be selfish... i think i did a good deed to them... i guess i m a great person...hahaha...sooo proud of myself but the cedit does all go to me... have to thank all who were there for me and pulled me to make this decision...hmmm and mostly i wanna thank god bcoz lyk wad pastor and adele told me it is impossible to give in to a person from the starting to the end....it is bcoz of the faith with lord and the power of the lord that made me able to do the unpossible and a feel the miracle.i guess god heard my prayers and know that i wad suffering in soleumn...hmmm now i do not hate sion in the fact i luv sion even more now as a frenz.and i hope to bring him to church to repent and wash his sins away... he sin tooo much....now he say he had gain his freedom...hmmm i guess he is still not as mature and me...he still thinks he did nth... but everyones knows i did most of it lahz...haahha but i forgive him as he gave a set of memories which are very precious to me.He is the first bf i was sooo madly in luv and first bf that until now we are still frenz..
for melvin...
WHy u sooo scared of me???WHY cant be friends????hmmm i will eat u up mehz????hmmm think soo much for what....you know me for sooo long u shld noe me.... i verry friendly de...hmmm break up can still be friends...hmmm i dun hate u for breaking up with me...actually i thank u as i hate making decisions...hmmm thankew....
for my friends...
dun scold sion le...hmmm let god take care of him....nonetheless he is now my gd friend.... hmm i forgive him....sooo we shld forgive too...hahhaa...retribution only god can give...not us...we must be happy for sion instead that he found his true luv...not sure if she is the one but he feels that she is then yea....we shld wish them the best...hmmm dun care abt how he treated me...hmmm sooo dun sms or find where he works at or tell him new abt he and HER....hahaa i just wish that they wld be happily together as i cant give him happiness then she give lor....i tried my best and gave my all le ma.... LASTLY i wanna thank u ppl for cheering me up and being there for me...hmm i have to say i discover who are my true friends and these 2 weeks as i was crying over sion i gained back all my old friends and had more... sooo i gain more than i lose through this rls...now i have a darling calvin???weird. but yea???shall have fun with calvin the crapper.calvin u will not be alone ur days will be coloured with MAUREEN all over...hahah...sooo u betta be prepare to be loved by me!!! but tell u first... NO STRINGS ATTACHED...lol...
for sion....
hmmm u lost a gem and gain a gem!!! hahaha....hmmm i dunnoe y u say u had gain ur freedom did i pull u down??? for me i dun think sooo...but yea... ooo ya sorry that i stepped on ur tail and call ur luver a ****....but yea...i m sorry.... out of anger....hmmm i m soorrry... but on the other had i have publish it...Nonetheless we are still gd friends...u r still my bad senior...we can still go out for pool and crap ard and send me home lor just lyk the old days....i have to say that u gave me a lot of things that no one did thats y i loved u soo much...i will keep all those sweet smses and memories with me to the nx step of life and to my nx bf...hmmm as for u and HER..sorry i use HEr coz u dun wanna see her name on my blog EVER...sooo i shall say HER...my friends may say im foolish to pray for u and HEr to be together...but yea i did pray because it is really hard to for her to come back into ur life again...it takes a miracle...hmmm that is wad god have given u so do treasure it and dun do things she doesnt lyk...As u said if im urs god will bring me back to u...I hope u wld go to church and wash ur sins... i did my part.... if u dun believe in washing ur sins then its fine with me as i wont be living up with them lahz...hmmm i hope u do not do make the same sin as wad we did....hmmm yea...thats all i have to say....Friends??i hope so... u decide...
lastly i wanna make an open prayer in this blog...dun think i m sooo great ah!!!these words are from god he made me type this is the sense...
dear lord in heaven,
i thank u for everything u have given me... i know u made me suffer at first but i know these are the plans u made for me... proberly a lesson for me to learn.... i will learn from them and take them with me onto the nx rls..lord i thank u for all the angels u brought down to protect me... thank you for forgiving my sins...i guess i paid a hihg price to be forgiven.lord i pay that u willl open sion's heart into accepting christ and do forgive his sins... i hope u will bless him and jing ting to be together... Since fate brought them together then i guess the are meant to be... i hope that they will treasure each other tilll enternalty...lord i thank u for giving me sooo many good friends who were there for me throughout this journey... i guess lord u are fair to me that u made me lose a lover but made me gain loss of experiences and friends...i hope u will open my heart and bless me through the nx week... I hope to learn more abt u my lord and noe more abt the miracle u had given me as it is impossible to not be selfish as to have sion for my own and not give him his happiness...i thank u and glorify ur name.... i jesus name...Amen....
Xue Hua
| 11:13 PM
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